There are still so many cultural myths encompassing the topic of sexual history and how to tell if a girl is a virgin. This can be very significant to some cultures and religions, but it’s also a vulnerable subject for so many people (for justifiable reasons).
Understand how to pull apart the myth from the fact, and determine the best way to talk respectfully with people about virginity and their sexual history.
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Can You Identify If a Girl Is Still a Virgin?
Regardless of a lot of myths are there about virginity, if you are thinking about how you can tell if a girl is still a virgin, it’s essential to understand there’s no method to tell. This also applies to people who were born with vaginas but don’t identify as female. It’s also true if you want to know if a boy is still a virgin.
Myths About Virginity
- Doctor Exam Myth
- Some think a doctor’s exam can confirm virginity.
- No medical exam can prove if someone has had sex.
- No one has to agree to this exam.
- Intact Hymen Myth
- Some believe an intact hymen means a girl is a virgin.
- The hymen is a thin membrane around the vaginal opening.
- It can tear during sex but can also break from other activities like sports or using tampons.
- Not all girls’ hymens break, even if they have sex.
- Bleeding After First Time Myth
- Some think all girls bleed during their first sex.
- Bleeding depends on many factors.
- If a girl’s hymen has already stretched (e.g., from tampons or masturbation), she may not bleed.
- Each girl’s hymen and genital shape are unique.
- Some girls bleed, while others do not.
Other Myths About Virginity
Here are some other myths about virginity that are not true:
- Once you are at a particular age, you possibly have had sex. This is ridiculous to all extent. There is no specific age when anyone loses virginity.
- A girl appears to be different after she has sex. This is also not true. People who do a lot of sex look exactly like people who are virgins.
- A girl might seem to know more about sex after losing her virginity. However, not everyone’s behavior changes the same way after having sex. Today, there are many ways to get accurate information about sex.
Tips for Talking About Virginity and Sexual History
Intimate experiences are very personal and private, so be very mindful and deferential in discussing the subject of virginity. You can’t force anyone to tell you anything, and being asked this private information can be completely displeasing and provoking. If you’re going to talk about this, take these tips into account:
- Take your partner’s permission before asking about sexual history. Just like everything else connected to sex, you need permission. If you want to discuss someone’s sexual history, ask if it’s agreed if you ask them about their personal life.
- Respect their decision if they don’t want to discuss it. You can ask your partner, but you should feel okay with someone not wanting to answer. Be courteous and kind if she doesn’t want to discuss it with you about her sexual history.
- Create a safe space. Make certain you have an emotional (and physical) safe space. Sexual history is a very sensitive topic and if you are going to ask about this to your partner please confirm the other person’s comfort and feeling before raising the subject.
- Don’t judge. No matter what the person tells you, don’t react judgmentally or with suspicion. An unpleasant reaction will disturb your relationship.
Final Words
The answer to the question about how can you tell if a girl is still a virgin is very easy: YOU CAN’T. But if she chooses she can tell you about her virginity. Don’t forget, the answer may be just as personal and private as what goes on at the time of sex. And just like with everything related to sex, it is all about permission and feeling comfortable.
